My Life: How it should be.

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dramatizes:

this is so powerful and unexpected. watch it to the end, i promise it’s worth it.

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young-and-not-so-invincible:

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young-and-not-so-invincible:

andtheleavesthataregreen:

Yes Harry, that is exactly what happened.

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young-and-not-so-invincible:

positively-beautiful:

Omg I love this.

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young-and-not-so-invincible:

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young-and-not-so-invincible:

youjustinspiredme:

Follow HIM he is looking for a tumblr girlfriend and boyfriend
He wants to be nice to them and make them famous  
He is choosing out of only new followers

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It’s amazing what one ring can actually do. This would probably be bought as an engagement ring, and signify one’s love towards another and bring happiness. Yet in my case, somehow, it caused a massive falling out over what should have been just a simple conversation.

To cut a long story short, about an hour of silly bickering and harsh words lead to me officially being “on a break”. Now, I have no idea what that actually means, but I’m guessing it means I pissed off my girlfriend. 

My look on life, isn’t the typical way to look at it. Yeah care-free is a popular trait, but apparently that and scientific outlook isn’t. I like to embrace the feeling of love, as I believe it is more than just chemicals and brain signals. But technically. That is all it is. And it shouldn’t, but I think it does, affect how I love others. Where one might love their family with all their heart, it’s genetic you’re supposed to - and that kind of takes the magic out of it for me. I like to think I could do fine with out them, of course I couldn’t - I need help for some things, but i can easily dissociate from them more than others could. 

And this unfortunately I think affects how I love others. Until my current relationship I have always been rather clingy, and it repels people. And I have learnt from this. Even clingy in general day-to-day life doesn’t work. I have learnt to be self sufficient. Try not to feed off of other’s attention too much. I am not going to deny I don’t like the lime-light every once in a while, but I try to avoid it. 

I don’t really know where I am going with this, but I guess I just wanted to vent my feelings - as this is what a blog is for. And the reason I don’t post here often is because I tend to not have any worries or cares. But I seem to have them now. 

What does this break mean?

Will it lead to us breaking up? As I hope not. I enjoy the relationship, and I feel complete when we’re together. 

However, recently - as I brought up to her today, causing me to write this in the first place - I have felt our relationship has focused more on the future of us, than now. And I am very much a now person. Why waste time thinking what was, or what will be, when we are living in now. We are now. I mean, yeah I have career aspirations, but all I want is to be Matthew Gundry Ph.D. or Dr. Gundry. That’s my aspiration, then I’ll take it from there. I’m not a big planner.

And I think this faults me slightly, and causing the kink in the relationship. However, I don’t see how I suddenly become a liar. I don’t even know how we even got on to that, but I can assure you I never lied. Everything I said was truthful - and I really did have a dream we had a child. 

Crazy stuff going on here. Almost considering changing my name back to mylifeintheirhands. Just when I thought I was getting my own grip on life, and wow. Blimey-o-riley.

I think it’s time for bed now, so night night!

xxx

If anyone has anything to say to comfort me or any advice just message me or reply to this please?

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